TW: potential invalidation and transphobia
Disclaimer here: I might say things in this post that sound hurtful or exclusionary to certain trans people. I am not trying to promote gatekeeping. I’m aware that some of the things I say are stereotypical. I’m just sharing how I feel and inviting others to help me change my thoughts and avoid prejudice in the future.
I kinda feel like I’m non-binary in a “binary trans way.”
You think of enbies, and you think of people rejecting gender roles and presenting in an unorthodox way. You think of them joking, “I have no gender, I’m just a swamp monster” (or however the meme goes). There are even enby celebrities who basically say they identify as nonbinary because they don’t conform to gender norms (which is not what being nonbinary is, btw!).
And then there’s binary trans people. People who have known for a long time that they’re different, just not quite right. When they discover who they are, they just want to fit in. Binding. Makeup. Whatever it takes to pass and reduce dysphoria. And despite being genderfluid, I usually relate to their experiences more than those of other genderfluid/enby people.
I wish I was a binary gender so that I could truly go stealth, and be comfortable with myself without having to draw attention to my identity. I’m afraid that people will see me as a “quirky, flamboyant gender-bender” rather than a normal person just like them.
I guess this is probably just me stereotyping people like this. But I don’t know how to not feel this way. I’m just upset and don’t know what to do about it.
You should add that not all 'binary trans people do those things or even feel dysphoria let alone know their whole lives something is wrong./gen /nm 
^ I said I knew it was probably stereotypical for me to think these things, but I added it again to the beginning.
You want to be seen as enby but not have questions about what that means?
I guess so, yeah. Maybe I’ve absorbed too much negativity and am subconsciously converting it into stereotypes about other people. I’m concerned that I’m going to end up being mean to people who experience their gender differently, in the way that I describe as “typical enby.”
Exposure therapy could help in the sense you could make a post actively seeking out other users here who have very different experiences then such stereotypes to sort worp the thought process like wake up call in a way.
-Leon he/him pronouns.
^also it could be cool to see users explain their genders
^Not only that but in.. “special cases” such as Vessel who has.. a complex identity. You’d be getting answers from us (the links’) as well if you want.
-Leon he/him pronouns.
Mrrrp.. I think I understand what you mean. You don’t want to be an attention-seeking “quirky gender-bender,” you just want to feel normal. The thing is… you’re already normal.
If people see you as quirky and attention seeking just for being yourself that’s their problem٫ not yours.
I don’t wanna be that person but you can’t tell people that their way of being nonbinary is wrong especially when you don’t know them personally and you’re not them. there is no right or wrong way to be non binary, non binary is a spectrum of identities. if someone feels comfortable calling themselves non binary there’s no reason to question them.
Idk why i wrote this, you don’t like sharing a term because of how other people perceive you and i get that